


The Land of Food Dyes and Clubs

by krazieLeylines



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ashen Romance | Auspistice, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-01
Updated: 2013-04-01
Packaged: 2017-12-07 05:00:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/744528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krazieLeylines/pseuds/krazieLeylines
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rose teaches Gamzee and Terezi how to decorate Easter eggs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Land of Food Dyes and Clubs

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this during Easter, even though I'm posting it the day after. It's really just a short drabble about my ashen otp, since no one else seems to have written any fics about this particular trio.

"You good?" John hovers in the doorway, an expression of apprehension staying on his face even as Rose smiles back.

"Yeah, I think we have everything we need. We're good."

Rose looks to the table, from the cartoon of hard-boiled eggs to the paper towels to the array of painting and dying materials. Everything is in order, like she predicted.

"Okay." John stays in place for a moment more, as if giving Rose a chance to take it back.

"Go. I know Vriska's looking forward to her very first bible gathering."

"It's just a tradition I've grown fond of," John reminds Rose again, rolling his eyes, "Reminds me of dad."

Rose smiles again, and this time it's genuine. "I know. Make sure that Vriska doesn't give anyone a reason to exorcise her."

"I will. Don't let Gamzee and Terezi eat all the food dye."

Rose glances over her shoulder to the two trolls, who at the moment, at least, seem to be minding themselves. Terezi is tapping the counter with her claws, the very picture of boredom. Gamzee not so subtly elbows her, and she sits up straighter with a guilty smile plastered to her face.

Rose bites back another grin, not wanting to encourage her mischievous clubs.

"I'm more afraid of them wearing it," Rose admits to John, "However, at this point I believe it's more or less inevitable."

John laughs at that, finally relaxing. "I'll make sure the washing machine is empty just in case."

"Thank you, John. You might as well jinx me while you are at it."

John snorts, and Rose goes over to give him a quick hug. She then straightens his tie for him, just in case she wrinkled it. "Have fun."

"You, too. Gamzee, Terezi, try not to cause too much trouble!"

"Ahh," Rose clucks her tongue, "There's the jinx I was waiting for. So considerate you are, John."

Laughing again, John waves at Gamzee and Terezi, and turns to leave, hesitating only a fraction of a second this time before pulling the door closed behind him.

Rose tilts her head, listens for the sounds of Vriska's complaining and the shuffle of shoes and jackets, and then the shutting of the front door.

"So... we're prettifying these ugly mug eggs here, right?" Gamzee asks, seeming to be uncomfortable with the sudden silence.

"They're not ugly," Terezi says almost immediately afterwards.

"You just finished with calling 'em bland as sand, sister. Don't disagree with me just for the sake of being motherfuckin' disagreeable. You're in the habit of doing that all on your own."

"Ugly and bland are two different adjectives," Terezi argues.

Rose clears her throat, deciding to intervene before things start to escalate. They hadn't even taken the eggs out the carton yet, for fuck's sake! "They are, however, synonyms," Rose puts in, which has Terezi flushing deep blue-green in indignation.

The highblood snorts his amusement, like a proud child watching his sibling get in trouble.

"Don't look so smug, Gamzee, it's an unattractive quality, or so I've been told." Rose takes the first carton, pushing it towards her ashenmates, "And to answer your previous question, yes, we are dying the eggs. First, both of you choose a color."

"I want red," Gamzee puts in before Terezi can even open her mouth.

"What? No way! Now you're the one trying to be disagreeable," Terezi hisses at him.

"All I said is that I want red."

Rose sighs and crosses her arms. So it's going to be one of those days, she thinks to herself.

"Gamzee, everyone with eyes can see that red is my favorite color."

"Blind jokes ain't cool, chica. Might offend some dumb broad who got her eyes burnt out or some shit."

"Who cares? I'm not blind anymore, you dumb fuck."

"Real fucking shame, that."

Rose holds up her hand, and they both fall silent.

"Gamzee, is it at all possible that you picked the color red just to piss Terezi off?"

"Nah, s'not like that, sis. I got just as many reasons to be fond a that color as she does, maybe even more. Like it reminds me of Karbro. She had her chance to be part of that miracle, and she gave it up, so seems to me she can't like red all that much."

"Wow, you're one to talk."

"Do not even go down that road, graysis. You will not like what you will motherfuckin' find."

"You're the one who started it. If you didn't want me to use it against you, you should have thought of that before you broke Karkles's diamond."

By this point, Gamzee looks like he might actually leap at Terezi, claws and all, so Rose makes a quick decision.

"Enough!"

Rose wasn't even really aware herself of how her voice had taken on a sharp edge, but it must have, by the way Gamzee and Terezi are now looking at her: eyes dilated, brows raised, mouths slightly parted. It is a certain sort of emotional arousal that they always experience when they know Rose is seriously pissed off.

There are so many things about the psychology of trolls that Rose would love to further explore and eventually write a book on, and auspisticism will probably be her opening chapter. She finds it fascinating, the struggle of hate and need in a three-way partnership, and this expression in particular says it all. The way they respect her, even as they despise her. The way they desire her, in a way that is emotional rather than physical. It always arouses Rose herself a little bit, to be aware of the power she holds.

"Okay, Gamzee can have red first because he called it first," Rose tells them firmly, "After the first egg, the red will go to Terezi. You guys can pass it back and forth as many times as you need to."

They both grumble, which is a good sign that Rose is doing her job correctly.

"Fine," Terezi finally says, "I want purple."

Gamzee makes a show of rolling his eyes, so hard that his head goes along for the ride.

"Now who's trying to piss who off?"

"For your information, since I can't make an egg for Dave, I'm going to make one for Rose."

"Oh, brown-nosing the auspistice. Real motherfuckin' original."

Rose gives Gamzee a harsh pap to his forehead and smiles at Terezi. "That's sweet," she interrupts, "but it won't put you in my favor."

"Well, obviously," Terezi replies, "I know you're too smart to fall for some sort of lame colorful bribe. Even if it's also edible. These eggs are edible, right?"

"Yes, they're edible. You've had eggs before, haven't you?"

"Yeah, she has," Gamzee answers for her, "I made her an omelette that one time, remember?"

Terezi's smile twists into a look of confusion. "Is that what omelettes are made out of?" She picks up an egg, studying it. "How do we know there isn't a baby dragon or bird inside? Or is that what makes it taste so delicious?"

Since she has long since gotten used to trolls and their ways, Rose doesn't even flinch. "There are no babies in the eggs. Or any kind of infant of any species."

"Damn," Gamzee says slowly, glancing sideways at Terezi in a meaningful manner, "I was looking forward to eating dragon."

"In your dreams, Makara."

"More like in my memories. Wasn't so long ago you were, what word were you up to using? Addicted. Addicted to my bone bulge, hmm?"

Terezi's blush returns in full force.

"Gamzee," Rose says, lips pressed tight as she puts a cap on her anger, "Refrain from making provocative statements, if you would."

There is more grumbling from the clown as Terezi fiddles with her fingers.

Time to change the subject.

Rose hands each of them an egg, and prepares a cup of red dye for Gamzee and a cup of purple dye for Terezi.

"Alright," she narrates as she grabs her own egg and a cup of green, "Watch me as I use the ladle to place the egg in the cup. The longer you keep it in there, the darker the color will be." She works as she talks, lowering her egg into the green water and allowing it to stay there for a few moments more.

When she dares to peek up from under her bangs, Rose is pleased to see that Gamzee and Terezi are focused entirely on her.

Rose retrieves the egg carefully, and shows off its jade color to them.

"Miracles," Gamzee murmurs predictably, "Bitchtits miracles, thorny-stemmed sister. How does that even work?"

Terezi gives Gamzee a look like she can't even believe how ignorant he is. "It's food dye, you lop-sided frond. Believe it or not, that's actually its main purpose. I would have thought that the name would have been a fine first clue, but I suppose I was asking your think pan to do too much work."

"You calling me stupid, baby girl?"

Oh, not again, Rose thinks.

Terezi's lip twists in disgust, like the words are almost painful for her to say. "No, no, not at all. I'm not in the business of stating the obvious."

Sighing irritably, Rose leans forward to intervene.

Gamzee gets there first.

"I'll be the first to admit that I ain't always the brightest piece of chalk in the box--"

"That's a laugh! Who was it who actually thought that Caliborn was one of the promised twin Messiahs? That's not what we call a minor slip of common sense, you oily-brained circus freak!"

This time Rose is far too stunned to even think of saying a word.

Gamzee's wounded expression is quickly masked under his rage. "So I read some signs wrong--"

"You ditched the only person who ever saw any use for you like he was a used tissue," Terezi snarled, fangs cutting into her lip, "and you even rubbed salt into the wound by begging him on knees bloodied by the innocents you slaughtered to take you back. After all of that, you have the nerve to imply that what I did was cruel to him?"

"Terezi, shut up!"

Rose shakes, her anger almost making her sick with the burning of it deep in her gut. And now they are looking at her again, that same expression of want and need and the strange troll love they call hate.

They want to be scolded, badly. It's clear as daylight in their eyes. Rose isn't sure if that's normal for an auspisticism or just how Gamzee and Terezi work. They are, Rose is fairly sure, masochists.

Since they want it rough, Rose will give it to them rough. She squares her shoulders, and again a rush of power surges through her as her ashenmates both inhale sharply.

"All I wanted," Rose begins, placing a couple of fingers to her forehead to calm herself, "was for the three of us to have some bonding time. I was aware of the fact that you two would ruin the moment with your immature bickering, sure, but with the speed at which you did so... Surely I didn't give you enough credit."

The guilt trip is something that Rose rarely uses with them, because of just how powerful it can be. But it is a holiday, so what was the harm in spoiling them a little?

"And even then," Rose continues on relentlessly, "I imagined only light jabs, the kind of ill-mannered jeering that your species specializes in. To suggest to my past self that you would instead resort to such cruel remarks, picking away at the scabs of once nearly lethal personal wounds, well... I would have laughed. I would have laughed when I should have bought myself a ticket to Maine, where I have a matesprit who would have been glad to learn the Easter traditions of my people. If you two are so eager to be black, you only had to tell me, and I would have made some popcorn to eat as I watched you two tear each other down, and every other relationship you had along with it."

At this point, Gamzee and Terezi look absolutely, comically degraded. Rose could put a dunce cap on the both of them and they wouldn't have looked any sadder.

They stare down at their hands, and the both of them just sit like that for what seems like eons.

The silence is just starting to become uncomfortable when, after a moment, Terezi dips her egg into the purple dye, letting it soak for a long time. Rose thinks she is only fiddling, because when she pulls the egg out it is far darker than Rose's usual shade.

Then Terezi takes the paint brush and the paints and she begins, very deliberately, decorating its face with green dots and swirls.

Rose realizes what she is doing, but it seems that Gamzee does not. That is, until Terezi hands him the egg.

"Sorry for bringing that stuff about Karkat up," Terezi mumbles, "It was going too far, and your moirallegiance is none of my business, anyway."

Gamzee watches the egg, and takes it delicately, as if he doesn't realize that it's hard-boiled and won't break easily. "Sorry for bringing up your former disability," Gamzee mutters back, ashamed and dark, "and making inappropriate caliginous comments."

He moves the egg around his palm. When he looks up, he looks at Rose. "I still want to make my first egg for Karbro. But after that I'll make one for Terezi."

Rose nods at him. "That's understandable. I can respect that."

Apparently Terezi can, too, for she leans over to place a kiss to Gamzee's cheek, which ends in the customary nip of teeth that ashen relationships are known for.

Gamzee turns his head, and nips the side of her lip in return.

"Besides," Terezi says, quick to return to her former self, "I don't need to use your past to burn you with my words."

"Well, the same to you, chica."

Rose watches them, like a proud parent, which is closest human concept she can compare it to.

But that comparison always tends to make her a bit uneasy when Gamzee and Terezi, on some unspoken agreement, lean over the table to place dual kisses on either cheek.

"Happy Easter, Rose," Gamzee says when he pulls away.

"Happy Easter," Terezi echoes, "I hope you still hate us. Um, in the troll romance way, and not the human way."

Rose rubs her cheeks, the spots where their fangs had scraped but not pierced stinging slightly. "Unfortunately, I don't believe there is a force in the world that can keep my perplexed human heart from hating you. In the troll way and perhaps sometimes, fleetingly, in the human sense. Happy Easter, you two nutcases."

And later, as Rose fears, Terezi ends up covered in food dye. The three of them snack on the left-over eggs they didn't get around to painting as they wait for Terezi's shirt to be washed and dried.

John and Vriska come back just as Terezi is retrieving her shirt from the dryer.

"So, Vriska, how did you enjoy your very first--"

"It was terrible!" Vriska says before Rose can even begin to say anything, "It was like they weren't even trying to make it interesting. What a booore."

It's only deserved that Rose is allowed to give John the "I told you so" face, so she does.

John gives Rose a shrug and a tired smile from over Vriska's shoulder, helping his matesprit take her fleece off. "It was pretty boring. But good, too. How did the eggs turn out?"

Rose knows that he is not asking about the eggs specifically. Rose again glances to her ashenmates, confirming that they are currently behaving. Gamzee is folding some of the other clothes that they had thrown in with Terezi's shirt, a lazy smile stretching his lips. Terezi has gone over to Vriska, and the two are chatting idly.

Returning John's exhausted expression, Rose grins. "Good. They're good."


End file.
